Assisted Pull Ups

I know. I should never title a blog after an exercise.  How dull can you get?

But I would be lying to you if I didn't publicly LOVE (and therefore bestow honor in a title) these things.  If I could die doing assisted pull ups, or even ON an assisted pull up machine, I would.  No joke (but for the record, my tombstone needs to say, "She ate the raw cookie dough," no reference to pull ups necessary).

They simply melt the flab away.

A couple of years ago, the Army was trying to decide whether it would change its physical fitness test and rework its graded exercises.  The pull up was one of the exercises it was weighing to include.  I was DEVASTATED they decided to nix the exercise as a measure of fitness for women.

1- If they had included it, women would do pull ups; after all, in the Army, as in education, you train to the test.  If they had included it, women would be doing a whole lot more pull ups.  There would like INSTANTLY be less obesity but also INSTANTLY more confidence.

I mean, have you SEEN the movie G.I. Jane?  They should have not only kept the pull up, but also the sit-ups-while-hanging-off-the-top-of-a-bunk-bed.  What would it have fixed?  Only most women's two pressing issues: arms and abs!  (And now you see why I was not asked to join that commission).

For real, Army!  Do you WANT them to be all they can be or not?!  Because the last time I checked my Organizational Leadership books, happy employees make good fighters/gunners/drivers/doctors/mechanics/instructors/leaders.

And there is no lie: pull ups will make you a happy woman.

2- If they had included the pull up, there'd be a whole lot more outreach and a lot less bad blood among women in the military.

That's a HUGE generalization, wow.  What am I talking about?

I am talking about Airborne school.  We had to attempt pull ups to even go eat anything.  The guys would knock them out no problem, but the women had to have assistance.  I am not knocking anything, I am just saying that is how it was.  And whence came that assistance?  Other women.  We had to help each other out.  It was really cool, the camaraderie that developed.  I didn't see it again in my career.  Instead I had some intense experiences (which, I will own up to, MIGHT have been spurred by my task-oriented personality) that only dissipated by the grace of God and the normal Army cycle of transfers.
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PULL UPS.  GO DO THEM.  Find a monkey bar on a playground and gently use the step ladder for support... 2 to 3 times a week, as many as you can, in 2 to 3 sets.  Watch those shoulders and back get defined.  Don't worry - you won't get big!  God did not design our bodies to pop (though some magazines and drug companies will have you believe it) :)

It just feels good to put on a normal shirt and have some give in the sleeves, you know?

Clip your flappy wings!  Pull ups will do that for you.

I will keep on using the machine at the gym and my over the door pull up bar.  If I'm lucky, when I'm 88, that's still where I'll be.

Maybe by then without assistance.

Singing the Praises... In Greek

I believe whole-heartedly in the Mark passage that addresses that what is most important to God is what comes out of the heart, not what goes in to the mouth.

A registered dietician may disagree; I will err on the side of God’s word.

That being said, I still have to give a shout out to the wisdom God gave to some scientist on the Yoplait payroll.  Blessed be Yoplait’s Greek frozen yogurt (with strawberry swirl).  Oh my goodness.

My husband recently said I am the only one he knows who can drop weight while traveling and eating at restaurants and fast food places for two of three meals every day for a week.  Well let me tell you, traveling was no cupcake.  But it sure had some icing on it!  Woohoo, let's PCS again!  

We figured it out, though: while traveling, I didn’t have access to my freezer, and therefore did not have access to the ice cream that had somehow started to, once again, sneak its way back in to my appliance.

Was it really that simple?

And so when I encountered this dessert, and forked over the money for the novelty, I almost leaped with joy.  I might be able to permanently terminate at least 2 cm worth of my muffin if I eat this stuff.  Seriously awesome.  Compare the nutrition facts and it is great news.

Even better, it is truly truly frozen.  I mean, it is so frozen that I lose heart trying to scoop it out after six failed attempted scoopings.  I even have one of those fancy Pampered Chef scoopers, and it doesn’t work well in this tundra-ted dessert.

So the fact that I will be eating LESS of this frozen treat than what I normally eat of ice cream will keep the 2 cm of muffin off my top.

I KNOW God cares more about what comes out of my heart than what goes into my mouth.

But I have to pass along this amazing discovery.  Frozen Greek yogurt?  Glory be.

Goldilocks

This weather is too cold.

This weather is too hot.

This weather is too dry.

This weather is too wet.

I have caught myself at any one time saying one or two of those.  To be a personal trainer means I enjoy exercising but it doesn't mean I enjoy exercising in all weather scenarios.  At one point, I will admit, it gave me great joy to be seen in a rainstorm running.  I figured it would add to my portfolio submitted to become the first female Ranger.  Plus, they didn't have Tough Mudders back then so I had to create my own rah-rah Rambo scene.  But I am no longer that weirdo (arguable? Perhaps). 

Nope, I have become a fair weather runner.

Here enter Goldilocks.

I saved up during my deployments for lots of things, but one of them was a treadmill.  I couldn't ever bring myself to spend the money, so a year after my husband and I married, he spent it for me, on its rightful designation.  What a guy.

My treadmill gives me great joy.  She has saved me from running inertia (an object at fair-weather rest will remain at rest)  many a time.  And because she exists because of my pickiness, her name is Goldilocks.  I missed her for a couple of weeks during these weeks of transition, but she is back "up and running," and I even had my inaugural run on her this morning.  Felt so good!!!!

With Goldilocks, the weather is not too cold, not too hot.

With Goldilocks, the weather is not too dry, not too wet.

With Goldilocks, the weather is always JUST right.